I am not a racist...but I am a stereotypist

This is a very difficult thing to write about. There are landmines all around that could make me seem like a really bad person, but here it goes.

What do you think about when you think of a black person? A preference for certain foods? A certain way of talking or words used in speech? A certain income level?

What do you think about when you think of a Hispanic person? A preference for certain foods? A certain way of talking or words used in speech? A certain income level?

Does the same apply to women vs. men? Certain attitudes? Certain ways of doing things? More or less emotional? Stronger or weaker?

 I have to admit. When it comes to viewing people who are different from me, I do have a tendency to place certain stereotypes on them. I believe that most people, when they meet someone for the first time, naturally will start to make impressions about a person based on people they have met in the past with have similar traits. For instance, if I told you about a person and let it be known that this person is a soldier, what would you think about them? First things that come to my mind are that they are very regimented in their actions, perhaps stern in attitude, not too emotional, probably fit and likely prefer a certain amount of order in their lives. My initial assumptions are based on a few things – soldiers I have known, media portrayal of soldiers and things other people have said about soldiers. While my assumptions may be spot on or totally miss the mark, in no way are they bad – as long as I realize that my assumptions may not be correct to start with, but are based solely on previous experiences in MY life. When I actually get to meet and know the person, I may discover that this person has very few of the stereotypes that I was expecting – and I need to be open to that.

What if I had a family member, say father, mother or sibling, who had been killed by a soldier? I would dare say that I could have the idea that all soldiers were merely killing machines with no humanity and no remorse for what they did. I dare to say my assumption would be wrong.

Applying the same thought processes to people of a different race, it is very easy to stereotype someone based on the color of their skin. Even white people can be stereotyped – no rhythm, egotistical, not as athletic, etc.. It is the natural tendency of a person to try and understand new things or people based upon what they already know – but is this racist?

In the purest sense of the word, by definition, this stereotyping of people is not racist. Racist thoughts/actions imply some sense of superiority of one race over another. Most often, stereotyped portrayals of people do not carry with it any sense of one race being superior or inferior to another race. Even so, it is a very easy line to cross and the boundaries cannot always seem very clear, and to some people ANY stereotyping or categorizing of a person base on their race is a form of racism.

As an example, if I assume that a particular person does not have as much money as me based solely on the color of their skin, then I would think I am really pushing the edge of that boundary if I have not indeed crossed over the line. If I am honest with myself, I would have to admit that I have crossed that line on occasion – not with any malicious intent or desire to set myself as superior to another, but out of a natural tendency to get an understanding about a person. I am reminded of movies that we have all seen where the rich person will disguise themselves as an average or even a poor person and ultimately discovers the truth about what people think of them as well as what they misunderstand about people who are not rich. The important thing to keep in mind is that each person is an individual with life experiences that are uniquely their own and most likely they will have many traits that differ from the stereotypes we want to place on them.

So when it comes to race, there are many people who would state that ANY form of stereotyping, malicious or not, is a form of racism. There are others who say you really have to know a person’s heart before you can call them a racist. To be honest, I probably lie somewhere in between the two opinions. There are probably times when a person does enter into the realm of racism, be it intentional or not, and there are probably times when someone is accused of being racist when they are actually not, but may be riding really close to that line.

It seems many in society today are very quick to call someone a racist. I have often anticipated this myself and have been ready with my reply – how can I be racist when I have a black daughter? On the other hand, I have seen many news reports that are disturbing because they show that racism is very much alive and active, whether or not we want to admit it.

As my daughter enters her senior year of high school, I am concerned about racism that will be applied to her simply based on the color of her skin. I am concerned about jobs that she could be passed over, how people will treat her if they don’t know she has a white father (or because she does) and other stereotypes that could be applied to her outside of the “safety” of my home. I am concerned about her personal safety as well. Could she be attacked by a group of people solely based on the color of her skin? Unfortunately the answer is yes.

So are there any answers to the problem of racism vs stereotyping? I think there is not a clear, one sentence answer that can be given, but there are some things to do that may help.

·        Recognize stereotyping or racism within yourself. Be honest and admit it (to yourself) when you are attempting to categorize someone based on their skin color, religion, sexual orientation, gender, country they are from, etc..

·         Attempt to push past the social or personal stereotypes. Get to know a person and their situation in life without judging them and without pushing your own experiences on them. Appreciate what they have been through and how those experiences make them valuable.

·         Be open to people who are different from you. There are many great experiences to be gained and different perspectives on life to be learned. Too often we tend to stick with people we are most like, but when we take the chance to get to know someone who is different from ourselves, then we grow as well.

·        Be vigilant to stop true racism. Racism comes in many forms and any way in which is portrayed is wrong. When someone is accused of being racist, I am not so quick to judge, but I want to examine – as much as is possible – their full opinions and history before making this accusation. Even so, when it is clearly racism, then work to stop it.

·        Realize that people make mistakes. It is true. Most of us at some time or another have ventured into the waters of racism – either intentionally or not. When someone does and recognizes it, be willing to forgive them and applaud them for making a change away from that.

·         Eliminate inflammatory words and thoughts from yourself. Stop telling jokes based on race or other stereotypes. Change your thoughts when you realize you have them. Realize that not only black people like fried chicken – I like fried chicken too!!

·        Find commonality. Instead of distinguishing how a person is different from you, find the ways in which are similar. Food interests, religious interests, music, recreational interests, etc.. I have a black friend who I play cards with on a weekly basis. We have bonded over the fact that we have the same last name and although there is no likelihood at all that we are related to each other, we each call the other our brother because of our common last name.

I am sure there are more ways to combat racism and stereotyping. Just spend some time thinking about it and you can come up with more.


I wonder what other people think about racism or stereotyping. You are invited play in my playground but leaving a comment on your thoughts. Leave a comment, even if it is an opposing opinion, but play nice.